Not Just Skating Through
by Jessa L'Rynn
Summary: Toby's field trip isn't going to be any fun if he doesn't have a chaperone, and Sarah absolutely can't be there. Enter the Williams' siblings Knight or King in Shining or glittery Armor. Part of the 'Remind Me' 'verse.
1. Chapter 1

_Written at the request of Olfactory_Ventriloquism, because she wanted it, and because I've missed her ever so! _

* * *

**Not Just Skating Through**

_Part 1_

"And there's absolutely no way you..." Sarah sighed. "Yes, of course. No, I understand. Right, well... I'll do my best to arrange something." Sarah hung up the phone, then rounded on her bedroom door at the sound of a rather polite sort of knock.

She threw the door opened with a harshly growled, "What?"

"Hello, Sarah."

Of course there was a Goblin King on the other side of the door: he was as inevitable as the tide, really, and far more reliable in his own sarcastic, bent, and twisted little way. "I suppose you'd better come in," Sarah said as ungraciously as she could manage. She was very, very glad to see him, if for no other reason than because he wasn't a fellow human being, as she hated those at the moment. However, it would never do to give him even the hint that he was welcome. It was bad for his ego.

When she said bad for his ego, Sarah meant expansive for his ego, which was the same thing, really, as she inevitably felt the urge to puncture the ego at once if it got out of hand. It was silly, really, but she couldn't seem to help herself.

Just as she couldn't seem to help herself collapsing against his chest and forcing herself not to wish it was a brick wall she could use to brain herself. "Why are you here?" she asked warily, cuddling into his insistently in spite of herself.

"Never mind that now," Jareth said in his most soothing tone, his hands smoothing through her hair near her scalp, comforting. "Whatever is the matter, my love?"

There was a part of her that preened under his words, that swooned into his touch, that loved right back. As usual, Sarah crushed it ruthlessly. She had little choice, for a lot of reasons that would be perfectly clear and sensible if the whole situation weren't a disaster. She didn't want to need him like this, she didn't, and so what if she couldn't remember why right now. It would come to her.

Sarah took a deep breath and pushed away from the Goblin King, drawing some of his strength in with the air she breathed that smelled so much of him and his magic. "Problem at the school," she admitted.

Jareth frowned. "Your school or Toby's?" he wondered.

Sarah sighed and gestured the king to her vanity chair, sitting down on her bed so she could look at him or not, as she chose. "Toby's technically," she said.

Jareth draped himself artfully across the chair. He was quite the most attractive decoration in her room, Sarah thought, but as usual, kept the thought to herself. "Do tell, Precious. Perhaps I can help?"

Sarah nodded, then shrugged, then nodded again, and lay back on the bed. Staring up at the ceiling, she relayed, "I have an exam in the morning. It's a final and I cannot not go. But Toby's school just called, and he's got an all day field trip tomorrow, something no one bothered to tell me about ahead of time."

"How would that have helped?" Jareth asked. He sounded innocently curious, but Sarah knew he was trying to comfort her with the knowledge that she couldn't have done anything differently.

She hated it when he was reasonable. "I could have had warning that I'd have a miserable Toby on my hands?" she demanded. "You know, after the disaster on his last field trip, they said they can't let him participate..."

"That's absurd!" Jareth exclaimed. He jumped up and Sarah hid a grin. It would take just a tiny push to get Jareth to glitter off and make these people utterly miserable for being difficult to Toby. "He was in no way at fault for succumbing to appendicitis at school! I should..."

"It worried them," Sarah tried to soothe, even though she really wanted to rage and storm right beside the King. "They're afraid he's still not fully well, and frightened for what the other children might see..."

"There will never be another repeat," Jareth insisted. "Toby knows to come to you or I if he is feeling unwell now, and not to wait for his parents to notice." Sarcastically, he added, "I hardly think one can have a relapse of the need to have a body part removed."

"I know this!" Sarah yelped, his sarcasm always setting her on edge for reasons that she really tried not to go into. "But they've put their feet down. Unless he's chaperoned, they're not letting him participate."

"It's outrageous," Jareth decided. "Next year, we're sending him elsewhere, to receive proper schooling with more reasonable people. Do you know, they let him..."

"Yes, Jareth, I was there." Sarah frowned and rolled over, tucking her pillow under her chin and peering at him over top of it. "Though I do wonder where you get this 'we' stuff."

"He's my responsibility as much as yours," the Goblin King exclaimed. Sarah honestly thought he sounded not just wounded but crushed by the implication that he wouldn't want to look after the boy.

"Which is technically not at all," Sarah pointed out accurately.

Jareth slumped in the chair. "True," he conceded. His mismatched eyes flashed. "But I do not like it."

"I know, I know," Sarah said. Then, she grinned, trying to cheer them both up. "You're just mad you're not allowed to Bog him."

"I don't have to Bog that child to make him smell bad," Jareth joked.

"Hey!" Sarah protested. "He bathes."

"He's a small boy," the Goblin King said nonchalantly. "He is fully capable of becoming dirtier than he started in the first five minutes following his ablutions." He grinned at Sarah, teeth flashing, eyes twinkling. "Don't worry, Precious, we do grow out of it."

"I dunno, your Majesty." She sniffed the air and crinkled her nose. He actually smelled like cloves and night air, but to Sarah it was far better to tease him.

Jareth pounced. Sarah squealed gleefully as the laughing Goblin King tried to get hold of her. She knew he'd haul her off to the Bog if he got her secure. He'd never drop her in, and he'd bring her back promptly, but he seemed to take a peculiar pleasure in her screaming and kicking futilely at him.

"Can I play?" came a small voice from Sarah's doorway.

Startled, the two broke apart. Sarah knew good and well that they looked like lovers in a clench to anyone old enough to know what that was, just as she knew that the assessment would only be wrong because she and the Goblin King were the most stubborn people in the world. Generally speaking, consenting adults took their clothes off before having wrestling matches.

She stood up and threw herself into her vanity chair, drawing all the attention she could to herself while the Goblin King restored his hair and clothes to their usual elegant perfection. "C'mon in, Toby," Sarah invited. "We were just being stupid."

"Speak for yourself, Precious," said Jareth, with as much dignity as he could muster with a sock in his face. "I was being ridiculous. I spend too much time around goblins to imagine I could manage stupid with any degree of success."

Sarah wished she had a rolled up newspaper to whack him with. When the not-requested item appeared in her hand, she did exactly as she'd planned, then hit him again for reading her mind. Then, she did the worst possible thing she could do to the Goblin King: she ignored him.

"How would you like to skip school tomorrow?" she asked Toby enthusiastically.

Toby's cheerful, thin little face fell. "I can't," he said apologetically. "We're going roller skating, and Mummy said I could have extra allowance for the snack bar, and Daddy said if I like it, he'll buy me some skates! I can't miss it." (He called his mother 'Mummy' because that was the word Jareth used. Sarah had even picked it up, going so far as to call Linda Williams 'Mum' once.)

"No," Sarah agreed, trying very hard to hide her distress, "no, you certainly can't. Well, I can be there by lunch time, that'll at least..."

"I shall accompany you, Toby," Jareth offered. "That way, you'll have an adult present who can be responsible for you..."

"Assuming you're an adult," Sarah muttered.

"Be nice, Precious," said Jareth, "or I won't give you what I brought you. I'll give it to Toby instead; I'm sure he'll appreciate it much better anyway."

"What is it?" Toby demanded excitedly.

Jareth leaned forward and whispered in the boy's ear. From the doubtful look the boy gave the King, Sarah knew that, whatever it was, she would either hate it and refuse it, or love it so much that she had to refuse it. Damn damn _damn_ Jareth and his moral dilemmas.

"Can you even roller skate?" Sarah demanded, hands on her hips in order to glare most effectively.

"Of course I can roller skate!" Jareth exclaimed indignantly. "There's no sport Underground or Above that I cannot perform with expert skill. Whomever do you imagine you're questioning, my love, and must you wound me thus?"

"You've never even _seen_ a roller skate," Sarah answered.

Jareth's eyes narrowed, and his glamour slipped, revealing the full faery extent of his new-milk pale, perfect, thirty-something face. "You will be very surprised indeed tomorrow, my Sarah."

Toby watched them, a gleeful little grin all over his friendly little face. He even had his hands up over his mouth to stifle his laughter. Sarah winked at him.

"And that will be enough from your highness as well," Jareth said, moving across the room at lightning speed to snatch Toby up and tickle him.

He was so very, very hard on Sarah's heart at times like this.

"All right," she said, as he started levitating the child and allowing him to perform ever more complicated zero gee maneuvers. "All right, let him down. We need to go talk to Karen."

"Mummy said..."

"I know, Toby," Sarah interrupted, "but we need to make sure everything will be ok to the adults around you, too."

"Terribly dull, these 'adults'," Jareth mused, and dangled Toby upside down by his ankles. Hauling the squealing, squirming bundle of boy up into a more normal embrace, he joined Sarah and made sure his college-age-human glamour was back in place. (It wouldn't really matter, but the lack of it made Sarah worry that one day her parents would stop seeing what they expected and see Jareth as he really was instead, and all Underground would break loose.) Then, the three of them trooped downstairs.

* * *

"Karen, have you got a minute?" Sarah asked.

Her stepmother was just fastening on a string of pale pink pearls that shimmered softly in the white recessed lighting that had been installed in the living room just last week. As nearly as Sarah could remember, the pearls were new, too. Six years ago, just after Toby was born, she'd have resented, or even been jealous of Karen getting the pearls.

That was then, of course, before the Labyrinth, and real friends, and realizing that all the presents in the world couldn't change the fact that none of her collection of parents would spare any expense, provided they did not have to spare her the time. That was also before two words could get her a yard long strand of the same type of pearls, or anything else she might want as well.

The Goblin King had, after all, given her certain powers. Just because he had no power over her, it didn't mean her every wish was no longer granted. The only problem with that, as far as Sarah could see, was that he was still trying to grant the first one from time to time. Even if she knew why, she never let him win that one.

Still, that was another story. What was relevant at the moment was Toby. He was always what was relevant, actually, and Sarah didn't mind it in the least, since she didn't have to handle all this alone anymore.

"Yes, dear, what did you need?" asked Karen, all the elegance of a politicking lawyer's wife dripping from her every word. Then she noticed Jareth and Toby over by the grand staircase. "Hello, Jay, I didn't see you come in."

"One does enjoy being one of life's mysteries," Jareth replied. Something about Karen's nature always made His Imperial Majesty, Jareth, King of the Goblins, Lord of the Labyrinth, Emperor of the Southern Shadow Lands, et cetera, et cetera, ad nauseum, come sauntering out. Karen never got to see the fanciful, child-like, oversized imp who played with Sarah and Toby.

"You know him, Karen," Sarah said with a smile at Jareth that was all part of the routine, "he'd appear out of the woodwork if he thought I needed him."

"Yes, he's simply a knight in shining armor," Karen agreed, beaming at the Goblin King who acknowledged the compliment with a haughty, graceful half bow. "Now, Robert and I will have to leave in a few minutes. What can we do for you?"

"Toby's class field trip is tomorrow," Sarah said. "They're insisting he be chaperoned, due to the scare, last time."

"Yes, that was dreadful," Karen agreed with a vague nod.

Sarah wondered if Karen actually knew what last time was or not. "My finals start tomorrow, first thing, and I'll be in the exam all morning. I was hoping you'd send a note to allow Jareth to..."

Karen waved an artfully negligent hand. (Sarah would bet anything, seeing how familiar that gesture was, that Karen had been studying Sarah's mother, Linda's, public appearances to get that gesture just like that.) "Don't worry, we signed a form to that effect after that disaster before. Honestly, Jay, if you'd not been there, I've no idea what would have become of our Toby."

"In theory, one of the school personnel would have acquired a modicum of sense and made arrangements. However, I'm not entirely certain, and am therefore relieved I have your complicity in this."

"Oh, it's no trouble," Karen said. "Honestly, you've been a member of the family for years." She paused thoughtfully. "Do you know, I think you two might be married by common law in some states? You'd have to ask your father, of course, Sarah..."

"Ask me what?" asked Sarah's father from behind Jareth on the stairs.

Sarah jumped in to stop Jareth from acting on that smug and delighted beam he was wearing. Just because the parents thought she and Jareth were a couple didn't mean they actually were, no matter what Jareth openly (and Sarah secretly) wished. "It's been six years," she corrected calmly. "Almost six years. Toby's seven, it's been six years."

"How quickly the time has flown when we've been together, don't you think, Precious?" Jareth suggested, lowering Toby to the floor so he could indulge the rare opportunity to visit with his father and mother.

"Oh, that," said Robert. "Yes, well. Sarah, we were going to save this as a graduation present, but I think, since we're all here, yes, that would be ideal." He held his hand out for his wife and Karen went to his side, just as she did when they stood before voters and impressed them. Jareth, in return, came down to stand next to Sarah. "Karen and I have been thinking of having that third floor remodeled into an apartment for you. The balcony can easily be equipped with a separate stair so that you and Jareth can come and go as you need. I know how very fond of Toby you both are, and it's very important to Karen and I that you be able to spend time with him."

Sarah looked at Jareth who was, obviously only to her, overly amused by the whole conversation, in a disturbed and frustrated with reality sort of manner. "Lovely," Jareth started.

"Of course, I'll expect you to behave yourself under my roof, young man," Robert said quite sternly to Jareth.

Sarah felt herself going pale. Her trains of thought all crashed into one another. She couldn't think, could only stare.

Her father only proceeded to make it worse. "Obviously I'm exaggerating. I'd have to be mad not to know what young couples get up to these days. Just understand that I expect proposals and legal marriage proceedings at appropriate times."

Jareth smirked. "Actually, I proposed to dear Sarah the night we met. I've asked often since." He shook his head. "I've no idea what I'm doing wrong."

Feeling safe to do so with an audience, Sarah teased, "I'm holding out for a better offer."


	2. Chapter 2

**Not Just Skating Through**

_Part 2_

* * *

"A better offer," the Goblin King grumbled. "A _better offer_!" He stalked over and snatched up the nearest small goblin, waving it about to punctuate his points. "How can I possibly make a better offer? I, a _king_, offer to become a _slave_ to that woman and her whims." He peered at the goblin. "Hello, Rogon," he said mildly.

"Hi, majesty," the upside down and being vigorously shaken goblin replied.

"How would you like to conduct a mission for your king?" he asked.

"I don't know, how would I like?" asked Rogon.

Jareth frowned. He'd gotten a particularly thick one, this time. Although, if the goblin was going to be literal-minded, perhaps that could be a good thing. "Excellent. You'd like it very much, I'm sure." Jareth rounded up all the goblins within easy reach - about half a dozen, including Rogon - and stood them all more or less right ways up in front of his throne.

Peering deeply and intently into each goblin face, Jareth tried to convey the seriousness of his intent with only an expression. He was distantly aware that he might as well try to paint the Danube blue again, but he was not a man without hope. (Had he been such, Sarah would have killed him years ago, assuming the Goblins would have failed.)

"You are to go Aboveground and you are not to return until you can tell me every single detail there is to know about the mortal sport 'roller skating'." The Goblin King was, much to his dismay, not above lying to impress Sarah, in exactly the same was that Sarah was not under the sheets in his bed.

He was sure that analogy made sense. Somehow. Truly.

Well, it didn't, honestly, but it did remind him. "Work quickly and quietly, and do not under any circumstances tell our Lady the Queen that I am in need of this information. Do you understand?"

"Got it, Majesty!" exclaimed one of the more intelligent half-goblins.

Several of the others squeaked hyperactive, monosyllabic affirmatives. "We go right away and we not tell," said Rogon.

Jareth nodded and let them pop off. Then, he sat back in his throne and took advantage of the lull to review Sarah's last run of the Labyrinth. Surely there was something in here that she was not meant to be doing.

He found the easiest cheat rather quickly - she really needed to learn to cover her tracks better if she was going to blatantly break the rules right in front of the Lord of the Labyrinth. Ah, it was just as well. Once again, the run wouldn't count.

Turning her most recently rejected present, a shining little puzzle box, over and over in his hands, he wondered idly what she was doing Sunday.

* * *

Sarah Williams was quite used to hearing whispers in dark corners where ever she went. However, she wasn't used to those whispers arguing in broken English. Most of the time, whispers knew what they were talking about. That was, of course, unless the whispers belonged, as they did now, to goblins.

Sarah only had a limited grasp on their language, but she thought they might be calling each other names. Mind, they only had a limited grasp on their own language, so it wasn't guaranteed that this was what they'd intended. She settled down to listen, wishing she'd kept the toy Jareth brought her to entertain herself instead.

They babbled and fought and mentioned chicken several times, and then finally one of them spoke up above the others, though in a sound that would have been a whisper, had she been in orbit instead of right there. "King say find out. He say not tell Lady he want to know. He not say not tell Lady _we_ want to know."

That was probably the most amazingly coherent logic any goblin in their entire history had ever used. It was a pity Jareth wasn't here to witness it; he could knight the little thing. Of course, he would have to shift them all to the bog for figuring out how to circumnavigate one of his orders.

It wasn't that they weren't sort of intelligent, goblins. They were sometimes cunning and often times devious. They were just very Rube Goldberg in their plots, usually, connecting chickens or random objects to the situation not because they were necessary but because they looked nice or were interesting or occasionally because the item, in the goblins' opinions, wanted to be involved. All in all, logic and goblins were rarely in the same sentence, unless there was a negative in there somewhere.

Now all she had to do was figure out what the Goblin King said not to tell... oh, no. Sarah put her head on the table and buried her face so that no one could hear her giggle. He was so completely impossible, sometimes, she thought.

Sometimes Jareth and logic didn't belong in the same sentence either. Even if you put a negative in there, they'd never even been introduced. It was really just lucky for him that she loved him anyway.

Not that she'd be telling him about that any time soon, of course.

As she'd said, he'd probably never even seen a roller skate. She got hold of herself, finally, and stood to tower imperiously over the huddled pile of jabbering fuzzies. "Something I can help you with, fellows?" she questioned in her most accurate Jareth impersonation.

As one man, the half-dozen goblins all squeaked and threw themselves into bowing positions around her. "Now, guys, you know you don't have to bow to me unless there's other Underground witnesses."

"Oh, right," said the one she recognized as Rogon. "Sorry," they all chorused.

"Now, what do you need?"

"What is roller skating?" the goblin wearing the newspaper hat wanted to know.

"The King is not telling us," said the goblin who always helped Toby cheat at Scrabble. He sounded rather urgent to make that point.

Sarah rolled her eyes, then grinned wickedly. "C'mon," she said. "I've already studied for my test tomorrow, so I've got a little while tonight. If you promise to stay invisible and mostly inaudible, I'll take you to the same place the King's taking Toby tomorrow." She couldn't resist smirking before she struck up a worried expression just for the goblins. "Oh, I do hope Toby doesn't skate circles around Jareth. But Toby's a little kid, and the heavens alone know how old Jareth is..."

"I not tell him you said that, either," said Rogon.

"What?" said Sarah, mock offended, "and spoil my fun? That's not fair!"

The goblins all laughed and chorused, "Basis for comparison!" at her, a well rehearsed line that almost always made her laugh these days.

* * *

"Where have you been!" Jareth demanded of the small crowd of six vibrating, glowing, and effervescing goblins that were doing all this right in front of his throne. "And what in Oberon's name have you done to yourselves?"

"Cotton candy, cotton candy!" They all screamed this and proceeded to quake around his feet as if the floor had become rubber under them. One of them quite literally bounced off the walls.

"Oh, no," said Jareth. He'd wish that someone would kill him, but Sarah would likely bring him back to life and kill him again if he missed taking Toby skating in the morning. And why couldn't it be ice skating, like sensible, civilized people had been doing since the eighteenth century? He could ice skate circles around everyone, and throw in a triple-axel just for his own amusement.

But no, these ridiculous modern mortals had to put tiny wheels on everything, from their shopping carts (how he detested the metal monstrosities) to their chairs (and it was little wonder they got stiff in their offices if all the exercise they ever got was pushing themselves around), and now they wanted to put them on their feet. He supposed the next thing would be children's shoes for ordinary day wear. He probably ought to encourage that. He'd be willing to bet he'd get a lot of wished-aways from random strangers begging him to remove other people's undisciplined rolling brats.

However, that wasn't the point at the moment. The point at the moment was that his goblins had managed to get themselves drunk on sugar. "I sent you to learn about roller skating. At what point did I even remotely suggest that you should be allowed sugar in any capacity?"

"Queen took us!" one said, and another shouted, "Queen Lady give us cotton candy!", while a third just said, "We luff her."

They did, too, positively adored her, in fact. It had taken a few months for them to get used to the idea that she was going to beat the Labyrinth every week or so, but once they came to terms with that, they'd fallen for Sarah almost as completely as their king. Of course, there was also the Cookie Incident, which had definitely helped.

"You chaps have thirty-seven seconds exactly to sober up, or I shall bog you all," Jareth decided. "And then I'll start on your chickens."

The goblins panicked for thirty-six and a half seconds, and then they all stood there pretending to be turned into statues, too scared to breathe. Jareth resisted the urge to laugh at them - it was one of the rare perks of being king of the goblins, that they often entertained him through sheer ridiculousness. "Well?" Jareth inquired.

"We tell Queen Lady we want to know what rolling skates is..." began Rogon frantically.

"Roller!" hissed Roman, clutching at his newspaper hat.

"Sorry," Rogon whispered. "Queen Lady says she can taking us! If we stays invisible."

"And inaudible," added Jersey, tugging on his oddly colored sweater.

"We think that means quiet," Scrabble told Jareth in an informative aside that almost made the Goblin King smile.

They went on to babble at great length about disco balls and tiny wheels, about carpets and lockers and keys they weren't allowed to eat, about pizza and cotton candy and Laffy Taffy, whatever that was. (Apparently Sarah drew the line somewhere about what she would feed them. Jareth couldn't decide whether to be relieved or just bewildered.) They explained about highly polished floors, socks, and couples skates. Then, they started on the music.

"This very furry man sits in the box and he plays a song the Queen does not want to hear," explained Roman. "And she sighs and stops skating, but he still doesn't stop it. And when it is over, he makes a speech that everyone can hear, and then he plays a different song, and Queen Lady sings along and buys lemonade."

"Sarah doesn't like lemonade," Jareth said, confused.

"She says this is different lemonade?" suggested Tops. "It has alligators in it."

"And then," Rogon continued, looking at Jareth quite worriedly, "they plays the 'no-no' song. They does not get in the bog. Lady says they should."

Oh, god, Jareth thought.

"_Don't worry, be happy_!" sang Jersey.

Jareth snapped his fingers and Jersey was no longer with them. He'd promised every last one of them cleaner detail for even reminding him that song existed. It wasn't the only one, of course, but it was an absolute certainty.

The others stared for a moment, then Rogon went on so quickly, Jareth knew they were trying to avoid joining Jersey. "They does the Hokey-Pokey, Majesty. It not making any sense! There is no hokeys and no pokeys anywhere!"

"_That's what it's all about_!" sang Scrabble, then slapped his hands over his mouth, shooting Jareth a terrified look.

Jareth just shook his head in utter confusion. Hokey... pokey... he was almost afraid to ask. "Majesty," said Roman, "is that what it's all about?"

Jareth frowned, and flung himself onto his throne. "I doubt it, old chap, I sincerely do. Now, I have just one further question for you all."

They all looked at each other as if trying to decide which of them should live or die. Apparently, they didn't reach any equitable conclusion because they all finally turned toward him with wary half smiles. "Yes, Majesty?"

"Did I not explicitly state that our Lady the Queen was not to know about this?"

"No," said Roman, Rogon, and Scrabble. Tops and the other remaining goblin, who probably ought to be given an award for being so quiet, just looked at the other three like they were wholly insane.

"We didn't," Rogon insisted. "We tell her we want to know, and she takes us and doesn't bring you up at all."

"Oh, right," said Roman. "Except she said..."

The other four jumped on Roman. Jareth knew then that Sarah had said something deliberately provocative about himself. Under normal circumstances, he would have taken some effort to pay attention, and maybe eventually thrown a fit about whatever petty insult she had devised to annoy him today. However, he had neither the time nor the patience at the moment.

He thought roller skating establishments were still open in California. Summoning a crystal, Jareth used it to go investigate.


	3. Chapter 3

**Not Just Skating Through**

_Part 3_

* * *

Toby Williams was the smallest seven year old in upstate New York. Jareth, King of the Goblins, still had no trouble locating the boy because he was also the blondest. Even in a lobby area full of juveniles and chaos, the two met up quite easily just beyond the ticket counter at the roller rink.

"Hi, Jay!" Toby exclaimed, and launched himself at Jareth's leg, clinging when he got a good hold. Jareth smiled and put a gloved hand on the child's head. (He would concede to blue jeans in the mortal realms, and fully closed shirts, his youthful face, an elfin haircut, and only the most tame of his leather coats. The gloves, however, were Not Negotiable.)

A small brunette woman with a haircut not dissimilar to Toby's came over, smiling that smile worn by tutors and governesses of young children all over the world and throughout the ages. The hordes of rambunctious juveniles, not unlike his own goblins, parted ways for the woman as she approached. "Hello," she said, holding out a hand, "I'm Ms. Davis. I'm assuming from the similarity that you're a relative of Toby's?"

Jareth looked down into the similar eyes and Toby grinned up at him. "Jay's my bother-in-law," Toby explained in a piping, happy voice.

"Brother," Jareth corrected the pronunciation delicately.

"That, too," Toby agreed with a goblin gleam in his brilliantly blue eyes.

Jareth chuckled, then noticed that Ms. Davis seemed to be peering at him in complete surprise. "I'd assumed Mr. Williams' instructions had reached the school..." Jareth began warily.

Ms. Davis blinked. "Oh, no," she said with a strange titter. "No, it's not that at all. It's just, I went to school with Sarah. I wasn't aware she'd gotten married."

Jareth shook his head. "Neither was I," he admitted. "Toby was..."

"I thought he said you're..."

"My gran says Jay and Sarah is living in sin."

"Are living," Jareth corrected automatically. "Two people are, Toby. One is. Wait..."

Toby smirked at him, then scampered off. "It'll be the Bog for you, you imp!" Jareth called after the boy. He started to laugh as soon as he was sure the child was out of hearing.

Ms. Davis was peering at him with a curious, strange expression. "So you're where Toby gets his vocabulary?" she ventured.

"I am where he gets his grammar," Jareth amended. "Sarah supplies his vocabulary, sometimes in spite of herself." When the woman continued to stare, Jareth finally flicked an artful eyebrow at her. (If she kept gawking, she was going to get an eyeful of annoyed faery. Hopefully this would put her off, as Sarah tended to frown at him when he made people pass out in public.) "Weren't you one of Toby's instructors when he succumbed to appendicitis?"

"Yes," Ms. Davis said delicately. "As I recall, we had a hard time reaching the family."

"Indeed," Jareth answered coldly. "By the time I arrived, at the child's own summons, he was in considerable pain, in addition to his distress. I had to fetch his sister out of her examinations before anyone would allow me to remove him to a proper medical facility."

Pale and shamefaced, Ms. Davis stammered something about procedures and policies and parental consent, and legal action in this day and age and... Jareth cut her off with a regal, dismissive wave of the hand. "All in the past now, of course," he said. "Mr. Williams informs me that I'm now legally able to care for Toby whenever or where ever he should need me."

"Um... yes," squeaked Ms. Davis, and then she staggered off to annoy some other adults standing near the door way. Jareth smiled a bland but pleasant smile at no one in particular, and imagined bogging every administrator in Toby's school just to pass the time.

Joining the growing cluster of harried and parental looking men, standing like juveniles he introduced himself as Jay King. Toby had called him "Jay" all the time until just last winter, and the child's parents had always assumed that was correct, and then they'd overheard Sarah calling him "Goblin King". Somehow, they'd gotten the idea that the "Goblin" part was a nickname. Toby's parents' gift for self-deception was nearly blinding.

While they waited for the teachers to collect the children and hand out tickets, Jareth found himself in the middle of the standard, "and what do you do?" discussion that seemed to plague mortal males wherever they congregated. (He supposed it might plague faerie kind as well, but everyone knew what Jareth did and never had to ask. He made a point of knowing the occupation and station of everyone he met before the introductions, so it simply didn't happen Underground. There were days he really wanted a protocol liaison for Sarah's world.)

He was mercifully spared having to actually participate by the sudden rush of the children into the "roller rink".

* * *

"They don't quite fit you so well as I'd like," Jareth said. Other men could fiddle with laces and socks and all the features of these annoying, vilely colored devices. Jareth magicked them onto Toby's feet when no one was looking. "And these strings are easily long enough to wrap your ankle in them. No matter." A quick, well hidden flash resized the skates ever so slightly. "Much better," Jareth approved.

"But they're not mine," Toby pointed out.

"I'll restore them when you take them off," Jareth explained. "For now, they will fit you without causing blisters or turned ankles."

"Aren't you going to skate with me?" Toby asked.

"In time, perhaps." When the aches from learning had subsided a little, maybe. "Surely you want time with your school mates?"

Toby looked at all the kids who were bigger than him, then at Jareth with a reluctant half-smile. "I guess so," he said dubiously.

"Come now, Toby. You are a prince, not a peasant. It hardly behooves your highness to behave as if these others were somehow your betters. Do not seek dominion over them: they are not your subjects. But certainly, they can be your friends."

"I'm the smallest kid in the whole school," Toby pouted, though admittedly accurately. "Smaller even than the kindergarteners."

"You'll grow," Jareth promised. "Besides, your stature is no excuse. Think of Master Ludo and Sir Didymus. They are great friends, are they not?"

Toby suddenly straightened and squared his shoulders. "Sir Didymus wouldn't be afraid, would he?" Toby asked.

"No, I'm rather certain he's incapable of such a thing," Jareth said blandly.

"And you're never afraid," Toby added.

"On the contrary, I am frequently afflicted with such difficulties. I am in love with your sister, after all, and I assure you love is more frightening than anything. Nevertheless, we learn nothing if we do not face our fears. We gain nothing if we do not meet our challenges head on. Your sister has surely taught you that, even if the rest of us have failed."

"All right then," Toby said, squaring his shoulders, "I'll give it a try."

"Good lad," Jareth congratulated. "Do try to remember that the floor is slicker than the carpet."

* * *

It was perhaps an hour until lunchtime when Jareth finally gave up and got on skates to try his hand or, in this case, his feet. The majority of the persuasion came in the form of the mother of two: one large, sulky boy, and one girl in Toby's year. The woman had the same color hair as Ludo, the giant rock-caller. She was, in Jareth's mind, very nearly as furry, and was certainly as large and as loud.

She seemed to be of the opinion that Jareth was rabble, and irresponsible rabble at that. He'd admit (if forced) that he'd spoken rather sternly with her brat because the child had deliberately knocked down another of the children, and then skated off, laughing. He'd even admit that he had offered to help her daughter get started, if the unfortunate, sad-eyed little creature wanted to put up the Gameboy and give it a try. He failed to see how any of this made him irresponsible, never mind whatever she'd implied with that expression like he was dirt under her feet. However, Jareth would be proud to show her rabble, and penciled his goblins in for her dreams this night. But for now he was stuck, impersonating a mortal, and biting his tongue.

Sarah wasn't there to defend his honor (though there was a certain Eastern Queen whose ears probably still rang under the force of Sarah's chill, precise, and sword-sharp words). Toby was learning to like what he called skating (this mostly involved pushing himself along slowly with one foot, a technique quite popular with the children in Toby's year). Jareth decided roller skates were his only chance of being saved from the woman, since he couldn't, logistically speaking, chuck goblins at her. He doubted they had skates that would fit her.

He was unwilling, however, to stoop to the orange and brown monstrosities available to the general public. Jareth was almost certain that wearing orange for any length of time might kill bits of his soul. So he made his own skates, modeled on the pairs on display at the skate shop next to the skate rental, and on his favorite pair of knee-high, black leather, goblin-kicking boots.

He slipped in to the rather disturbingly immodest public facilities to change a few things with minimum witnesses, then straightened the fine leather laces on his new least-favorite pair of shoes. The slightly widened leg of his jeans allowed for better freedom of motion. He smiled slightly as he considered the wheels, clear like crystal and full of glitter.

He was the flamboyant performer King of the Goblins. Glitter went with everything.

* * *

"It's time to do the Hokey Pokey!" the chatty gent with the microphone commented from the glassed-in booth above the heads of the children.

Jareth had seen the chap outside his box a little earlier and found himself forced to admit that his goblins were quite correct. The fellow was quite the most hirsute mortal the King had ever seen, including the woman who was still eyeing him vindictively from the sidelines. He was also wearing a sleeveless, collarless t-shirt that did nothing to hide this, with a loudly patterned orange and purple shirt thrown over it in a sloppy sort of cheeriness.

Most of the men had eyed him with contempt, but there'd been more than the expected amount of envy in their eyes as well. The man apparently owned and operated the roller rink, several movie theaters, and a small "head shop" (whatever that was) out on Main Street. He was, in short, a businessman of the recreational sector, and those of the more suit-wearing enterprises envied him greatly.

Jareth was inclined to include himself on that list. Even dragged from his bed in the middle of the night (which happened quite frequently between the Goblins and the Wishers), he had to look regal, stern, and forbidding. Of course, if he turned up in some adolescent brat's bedroom with a purple nightshirt and a matching elf hat, he imagined he could get a great deal of amazement still, though not any of the sort he wanted.

At the moment, though, his concern was with the two older youths in logo shirts who skated out onto the course bearing a box of some sort. And, of course, with the announcement the man had just made, regarding poking. The Goblins were ample proof that children allowed to poke one another would shortly degenerate into fighting with one another.

The female of the pair bubbled and fawned up to Jareth, reminding him much to his dismay that very few females in either world considered him anything but a free agent. His subjects knew who their queen was, and Toby knew to whom Jareth belonged, but no Faery princess or, apparently, mortal equivalent could be easily persuaded that his heart did not wander. "You're the only chaperone out here," the skate girl enthused effusively. "You can help us."

He wasn't the only chaperone, actually. The middle-aged harridan who screeched and fussed and theoretically taught the year above Toby's had turned out to be shockingly spritely on skates and was currently doing backward figure eights around the children as she helped herd them toward the large oval drawn in the center of the rink. All the same, she seemed quite busy, so Jareth nodded easily enough while the young man of the pair sulked at him.

Never having known anyone except Sarah worth sulking over, Jareth found this behavior nearly as ridiculous as the girl's. They were too young to understand any affection they might have for each other, this pair, the shallow perceptions of youth holding them back. The boy dreamed of the girl often, but it tended to end in nightmares. The girl had dreamed of the boy once - and enjoyed the dream so much it terrified her.

Taking at look at the resentful young man who skated along reluctantly beside them, Jareth leaned over to whisper advice. "Smile," he ordered. "Show some enthusiasm. Your friend obviously enjoys her job."

The girl had skated on ahead and was laying the box down. Jareth followed the boy as they attempted to straighten out the kids along the line. "I have it on authority that 'being good with kids at them' makes even the most cynical of women more susceptible to our charms," Jareth explained, smiling down at Toby's brave little face. "Good lad," he added, patting Toby on the shoulder.

"If I fall down..." Toby threatened.

Jareth shook his head. "If you fall, you will pick yourself up like everyone else, Prince. Now, do try your best."

The girl in the center of the ring was already burbling out enthusiastic as Jareth and her friend skated up to them. "I admit I'm not sanguine about this at all," Jareth confided quietly to the boy. "Children poking one another..."

The boy stared at him. "Where've you been, dude? Living underground?"

"Certainly," Jareth agreed, amused. "Why?"

Wide-eyed and baffled, the boy decided to ignore the statement and just explain his instead. "It's a dance. It was probably invented by cavemen."

"Ah," Jareth nodded. "That's different." He looked at the bubbly ginger who was smiling at him expectantly. "I beg your pardon?" he said.

"Just tell these kids who you are," she encouraged cheerfully.

"I see." He waved away her amplification stick. "I'm Jay King," he announced, well able to make his voice carry to all and sundry in the entire large room.

"Great," said the girl. "Jay, Mike, and I will be here watching you and helping out. Mike and I are going to pick the winners at the end and Jay will be in charge of the prizes!"

The "prizes" appeared to be several certificates for free snacks or visits, and one exceptional prize of a family pass for the summer ahead. Jareth rather hoped Toby didn't win it, because he couldn't bear to see the disappointment in the boy's face when his parents couldn't come with him.

Jareth and Sarah did everything they could to make up for the Williams' home situation, but not everything could be fixed by going away with the faeries. Not even for the young Prince of the Goblins.

What the "Hokey Pokey" turned out to be was a ridiculously childish song involving gestures. Jareth would have been fine laughing uproariously at the children as they attempted certain maneuvers on such things as one skate, but he was, apparently, expected to demonstrate.

Right arm and left arm were no problem. Neither was picking up the little ones who fell as they did the whole "turn yourself around" thing, which involved skating to the other line to play on. However, standing on one skate would have left even the Goblin King in quite a bit of trouble. To his very great fortune, several of the children took this opportunity to fall over and, while Jareth helped them right themselves, he missed the whole standing on one skate thing.

His favorite part turned out to be the shouting. Jareth was a big fan of noise, couldn't help it if he was going to be a Goblin King. The goblins, when quiet, were often up to something, and Jareth had long since learned that the same thing applied to small children. The children were all encouraged to shout as loud as they could at the whole, "That's what it's all about" part.

Jareth helped several of the smaller children off the floor after they tumbled. Toby, however, made him button-bursting proud when he fell three times and determined to get up again anyway. He was the littlest person there, but he shouted the loudest, absolutely no contest. His enthusiasm was adorable and brilliant and Jareth found himself wishing for one of those picture flashing things so that Sarah could see this herself later.

When the game was over, Jareth was delighted to twirl and swirl around through the children, handing out certificates for the most spectacular fall, the best singer, the best skater, the fastest skater, and the overall winner.

Much to Jareth's distress, the winner was indeed Toby. He was thrilled and proud but also very sad, because of what was coming.

However, he needn't have worried. With a fierce little frown and a stern little stare, Toby skated up to a small girl that Jareth hadn't noticed Toby talking to or even looking at. His eyes widened as the boy handed the certificate over to the girl, without ceremony or even pausing to see what she thought. Then, he took his place back in the group as if nothing had ever happened.

Jareth felt a lot bigger than a King at that moment. The girl and the boy who worked for the rink were talking behind him, but he was too filled with pride and delight to even notice for a moment.

"That's all the prizes, everyone," the girl announced. "Make sure you all say thanks to Jay for being such a great help!" She grinned at the King and he grinned back, then grinned at her male friend for good measure.

"I enjoyed this," he said, as he noticed several of the children bouncing around Toby.

"Bob's not gonna like that, Mike," the girl murmured dubiously. "That's the Ellises, and there's like ten of them!"

"It's still a good thing," the boy said. "Bob won't mind, Anne, he never does. Besides, the Ellises couldn't come at all if they didn't have a pass, and this way, they might come and rent skates and stuff."

Jareth looked at the boy with a new respect. "You're a wise one, aren't you?" he mused. "I'll talk to Bob," he added, and skated off to check on his tiny charge.

Toby gave him a concerned look when Jareth skidded up to him. Laughing, the King of the Goblins snatched the boy into his arms and twirled him around. "You were splendid, my boy, positively splendid," he enthused.

"I did ok, really?" Toby asked.

"Ask your friends," Jareth said, looking down at the beaming children in Toby's grade with him. They'd been strangers until now, but the boy had won the contest, so they all wanted to know him. Still, they were all too young for politics, so Jareth didn't bother to explain.

It happened too suddenly for Jareth to ever explain it, even to himself. The kids were bouncing around his feet, as excited as a gang of Fieries on butane, and he was laughing and encouraging them, letting them twirl and twist around his feet. Then, one of them fell, and it started a domino effect. Jareth's only thought was, "I'll hurt one of them." Then, he was flat on his back, on the floor, with a startled looking Toby sitting on his stomach and a huddle of fallen children sprawled all around.

It was thoroughly ignominious, completely without even one shred of his immortal dignity. He knew without even trying that he looked completely ridiculous and the only consolations he had were that he'd managed to twist himself to protect Toby, and that Sarah hadn't seen it.

Then again, he'd know that laugh anywhere. His only consolation was that Toby wasn't hurt, apparently. "Is anyone injured?" he asked the ceiling. Several of the children began to cry.

Jareth was on his knees in an instant, Toby held tight at his side with one arm, and inspecting other children for injuries with the free one. Sarah was standing there in a second instant, and took Toby from him while she helped him right the others.

There wasn't a single injured child, just several shocked ones and more than one sympathetic cryer. As the teachers gathered round to help get the kids off the floor and to their seats, Jareth managed to ignore his chagrin. He simply knelt there and picked up kids and looked for boo-boos and teased and smiled and straightened mussed hair.

Then, Sarah smiled at him over Toby's golden head, and it was all worth it, every bit of it. Even the bruises to his backside and his dignity seemed mended by her unexpected generosity.


End file.
